Preparing for my surgery

I’ve been trying to get everything ready for my surgery.  I ordered a hospital table for my house.  I joined Netflix which is really so 1980’s.  I’ve been buying food for when I get home, mashed potatoes, mac n’ cheese (not easy mac), and jello.  I’ve been teaching everybody at the office what I do everyday and how to fix things if anything breaks.  Got my head shaved and even shaved off my goatee.

People ask me all of the time if I’m worried about my surgery.  I’m worried that I have two doctors who are arguing over which surgeries I should have.  I’m worried that I won’t get internet access in my hotel room.  I’m worried that I’ll be in a semi-private hospital room.  I’m worried that I’ll have some backwards question mark scar that is like 8 inches on my head.  I’m worried that they will put the 2×2 inch piece of my skull in upside down.  I’m not worried about the surgery, I’ll just be glad to have it over with, and hopefully I will be able to not have brain juice leaking from my ear.

Some random things I have been wondering about….  I wonder how many diamond tipped saw blades will they break while trying to cut through my skull, I do have a hard head.  I wonder if I say “Helllllo Nurse!”, if they will get the joke?  I wonder if my wife will pass out after my surgery, I’m betting she gets sick at least once.  I wonder how long my peeps will stay fresh that I get on Easter?  I wonder what will I do with myself, since I have to stay at home for a month, I’ve always wanted to take up a hobby, maybe underwater basket weaving.  And the most important one of all, when they tell me to start counting backwards from 10 once I have the gas mask on, i wonder how far will I get?

I have two more days before my surgery.  So many things to do, so little time!

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